I don’t know what it is this week, but I’ve had cereal on the brain—cereal monogamy, to be specific. For someone who writes about food so much, sometimes my own living-under-a-rock-ness astounds me. For example, I had no idea there were so many varieties of Cheerios out there. Chocolate? Dulche de Leche? Peanut Butter?  I’m intrigued.

Because I’m kind of a nerd, I wanted to check these out online before adding them to my shopping list. I’m glad I did. While I’m all for whole grain cereal, and the nutrition stats and ingredient lists are not completely terrifying, sugar is still one of the first four ingredients  for most of these flavors (corn syrup, brown rice syrup, and other sweeteners are also on the list). The artificial coloring is kind of a drag too.

I’m sure I’m not the first to say it seems like there’s a wolf in sheep’s clothing thing going on, with sugary cereals basking in the “healthy glow” shoppers associate with Cheerios. Okay, that’s a little melodramatic, but you know what I mean. It’s only cereal, I know, but it still bugs me to see artificial stuff on the list.

It also annoys me that the serving sizes are 3/4 cup for some of these flavors. For someone who’s used to the 1-cup serving of the original Cheerios, that could seem skimpy. I know USDA serving sized for grains are determined by weight, but that makes for a lot of confusion and misleading labels. Can I also point out that the “serving” in this photo is much, much bigger than what you’d get in real life? And what’s with the peanut butter-covered bagel and the green apple (I’m guessing) in the background? Mood-setting? 

Pardon the mini-rant. Maybe I’m just disappointed. I really wanted these Cheerios to be different, but in a lot of ways, they’re just like a lot of other cereals out there. While a handful of Peanut Butter Cheerios in your yogurt or a little mixed into your bowl with the old-fashioned stuff is a fun way to add some variety,  it’s probably not a cereal to settle down with. Why does this feel like a metaphor?

Okay, I’m gonna go before my under-caffeinated starts thinking of inappropriate jokes.

Have you tried any of the new Cheerios flavors? Thoughts?