courtesy of Turkey Hill

Confession: Though I don’t have an online dating profile (I made one once and took it down 10 minutes later because I got scared), I absolutely love HowAboutWe‘s blog, and I totally have a not-so-secret fantasy of writing a column there. It’s not that I go on so many dates that I’m any kind of authority—I just seem to have a lot of stories…I am told that “normal” people exist, but I can’t say I’ve had any sort of meaningful interaction with one. I should note, however, that in some cases, this should be taken as a compliment. Coming from me, anyway.

I could even just say snarky and/or tongue-in-cheek dietitian-in-training things about food choices, lifestyle habits and table manners. Or what about food allergy etiquette? Or what to eat before a date…Maybe one day I’ll talk about that month I was going out with someone who, like, never seemed to eat unless I said we should. This is why my sister and I have a rule never to date someone who eats less than we do—it only leads to hunger and crankiness.

I get a kick out of posts like this recent piece, which decodes what your ice cream flavor choice says about you on a date. As someone who likes chocolate chip cookie dough (dark chocolate gelato wasn’t on the list!), I was amused. The only thing that rings true is that I do take a “why not” approach to life. However, I can’t remember the last time I was drunk enough to forget something. For better or worse, I’m that person who wakes up clear-headed and says, “So, um, yeah. You probably don’t remember telling me you loved me last night but…”  Okay, so maybe that only happened once or twice, but like I said, stories…

Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough: You are really indulgent and party your ass off. You do what you feel like doing basically all the time, regardless of what your work schedule is or what other people think. You plan stuff for your friends and get them psyched to follow your lead. Your philosophy is, “Why not?” And you’ll try anything once. Or twice, depending on how drunk you were the first time.

I also cracked up over this one…

Sorbet: You’re a liar. You don’t ‘like’ sorbet. You’re on a diet.

Or they could be lactose-intolerant!

You can read about other ice cream flavors on HowAboutWe’s blog.

What’s your favorite ice cream flavor?